It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
