ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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