I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Randomize