I bet he comes in French.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
