Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
