Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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