it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize