just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
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Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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