You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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