i barfeds in our rink
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
