whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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