this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
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I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
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Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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