just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
