omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
