1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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