420 ftw
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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