Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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