Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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