Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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