I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
