Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
