Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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