I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
