went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
