took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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