Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
