Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize