As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
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i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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