I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
