I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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