Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize