Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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