She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality