Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
