He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are two peas in an std pod
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
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