I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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