I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
