He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
and she was petting her beer can
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
