Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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