Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
