Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize