Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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