Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
