Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Randomize
