that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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