yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
