I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
