I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
