she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
