thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
So squirting runs in the family.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
